A Different Variety
by Katia-chan
Summary: In her most vulnerable moments, Akito proves that human weakness never goes away. [97 spoilers, hints of AkiGure]


A Different Variety

By Katia-chan

A/N: Another fic for my LJ requests. Look at me be productive, lalala.

This was written at 5 a.m, once again with no sleep. I wonder if this is becoming a pattern?

A few forewarnings. I haven't tried to do anything with a real plot in a very long time. This is just a step above introspective, but it's still a bit alien, so I apologize for the generally disconnected suckiness of the thing. My sad little fic and I beg your forgiveness…there's also a past to present tense switch in there, but for some reason when I try to fix it it looks funny, so please forgive that too. Also, some people may be ooc. I'm very sorry, and I tried to stick to cannon oh so desperately, I'm just not sure if it worked entirely. Shouldn't be anything too terrible though…I hope.

One more warning:

I CANNOT WRITE MUSH VERY WELL!!

Disclaimer: haven't slept, don't care if you think I own it or not. The suits will set you right.

Dedication: To Windswift, who once again plotted for a long while with me, and to Adi88, who wrote a fic in which a line inspired many of these Teenage Akito fics that will be appearing. I couldn't and wouldn't write without these two. They give me life.

Enjoy!

XXX

Night had fallen over the house hours ago, and so she wasn't surprised at the strange look he gave her when she quietly pushed open the door to his room. He of course wasn't asleep; she was fairly certain he never did that. Instead he had a textbook in his lap, though he had set it down as soon as he'd seen her.

She liked that.

"Akito…" he said hesitantly. "Are you alright?" She nodded, but for once she wasn't entirely sure if she was. He must have noticed the odd expression on her face, because he put a hand on the bed next to him, inviting her to sit. She accepted, perching delicate and birdlike on the edge. "Now, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong," she snapped, a bit petulant. She didn't like explaining herself, and especially when she didn't know what to say. This wasn't common, her tongue moved with the fluidity and intensity of her mother's. It failed her now though, and this frustrated her.

"I want to ask you something," she said after a long pause. He sat next to her, looking at her intently, though saying nothing; waiting for her to continue at her own pace. She took a deep breath, and like everything she did, the words came quickly and sharply off her tongue, before they could get the right way to be said. "What happens when people love?"

He looked a little taken aback. She supposed she shouldn't be surprised. After all, she loves him and she is certain he loves her, so he must wonder why she is confused.

He says nothing for a long time, then, he asks quietly, "What kind of love do you mean?" She gives him an impatient look, sighing.

"Hatori, there's only one kind," she says, exasperated. He gets a strange look on his face, and she can feel herself getting angry. She wants her question answered though, and she knows he won't explain very well if he thinks she is mad at him. So she elaborates.

"Shigure told me that when people do things," she hesitates for a moment before going on. "When they kiss, or do other things, that it's very nice, and that it usually just happens when they're in love." Hatori gets the look on his face that she sees before he gives Shigure a glare or drags him out of the room. "Though," she adds after a moment of thought, "he said he's not always in love."

"How surprising," it's barely above a whisper, and she ignores it.

Folding her arms, she lifts her eyes to meet his, and she can't quite explain it, but she is suddenly nervous, and if she would allow herself to blush she would be. "You love me, don't you Hatori?" she asks quietly. He's looking down at her, and she can't read his expression.

"We all love you very much Akito," he says, and he sounds uneasy. He must have the nervous scared feeling too. It makes her angry, the butterflies in her stomach, and it's hard to talk. So she doesn't. She leans forward, and though she's only thirteen she is not nervous. He loves her, he won't reject her. She doesn't need to worry about that.

But then she does

"What?" she whispers when his hands find her shoulders and stop her from getting too close. He's choosing his words carefully.

"Akito…you can't." She stiffens, and angry tears flood her eyes.

"Why not?" she asks, shaking slightly. "This is what people do when they love, and you love me."

He's hesitant. "It's…a different kind of love." She's furious.

"I told you, there isn't a different kind!" she yells, hurt and scared. What is he talking about?

He seems more at ease now that she's started yelling. He strokes her back gently and talks quietly. "But there is," he says, continuing before she can yell again. "There's a kind of love, that you can only give one person. That's…a special kind. It's different, do you understand?"

She's calmed slightly, considering his words. Then she looks up at him. "Yes…" she says slowly, then more confidently. "I choose you to be that person," She almost whispers it.

He looks…sad? Then he slowly shakes his head. Before she can get angry again he takes her hand. "Akito," he murmurs. "That kind of love takes time, and it has to be…special. The first time someone kisses you, it has to be the right person, because you'll remember it forever." He's talking so much tonight, trying so hard, but she can't understand it, and she's hurt by what he says. She suddenly jumps off the bed and runs from the room, not letting him see the tears.

He doesn't follow her.

- - -

She's been in her rooms, crying furiously for who knows how long. The opening door makes no sound so she doesn't hear anyone enter.

"Oh my," a light airy voice murmurs. "What has upset you so my dear?" She looks up from her hands to see Shigure standing over her, regarding her with an expression that is equal parts curiosity and concern, and even a little amusement. She sniffs, wiping tears angrily away. He's laughing at her, and she doesn't like that.

"Shigure," she says very slowly. Then she whispers, "Do you love me?" He looks faintly surprised, but then he nods, kneeling down in front of her and taking her face in his hand, wiping at her tears.

"But of course," he says mildly. "How could I not?" When she doesn't answer he clicks his tongue. "Is our beloved God questioning our love for her? Is that what all these tears are for?" She shakes her head, angry that he doesn't sound concerned. She explains, so he'll stop laughing.

Which was of course what he wanted her to do from the beginning.

"I want you to prove you love me." The words come out a little sharper than she intended. He raises an eyebrow.

"How should I do that?" She scowls at him. He's frustrating beyond her patience sometimes.

"Love is a special thing two people have," she says, her voice getting softer and softer as she keeps talking. "Kiss me…show me I'm special to you, because you're special to me, all of you are." Her eyes suddenly well with tears again. "Some people apparently don't realize that."

He's not saying anything, and then he laughs and she gets angry for a second, but it's a different laugh. It's quiet and a little breathy, and it's different.

It's special.

"So our Akito wants her first kiss," he murmurs. Then he leans his head closer to her, and she can feel her pulse quicken in her temples. He is very close, and she can smell him, she can almost taste him. He takes her hands.

"Yes," she breathes. He bends, his lips less than half an inch away from hers, and then pauses.

"Close your eyes. You'd like to do this right." That's the last thing he whispers before he presses his lips to hers.

It feels so strange…there's electricity running through her, and it hurts…but it feels so good too. From the moment the kiss starts she stops breathing. It's something she's forgotten how to do. She spins out of her body for a second, and she's floating somewhere warm, and not quite safe, but so very nice.

And then he pulls away.

She takes a breath, slowly coming back to herself. She's lost in a haze of happiness. Hatori was wrong, she did choose, and it was perfect, and it was special, and it was love.

Until he stands and heads for the door.

"Where are you going?" she asks. He turns to her, and she can feel something fracture in her chest. He's smiling in the usual way, so relaxed, so careless. He shrugs.

"I came to see Ha-san, but I had to come see what had upset you so." He smiles at her. "I hope I've had enough practice at that to make it a nice time for you."

He sticks the knife in her back without even having to touch it.

She almost asks him if it was his first, but she can't. She can see now that it wasn't. He leaves, her still sitting on the floor in silence.

"He said it would be special…" she breathes. It was supposed to be special for Shigure too. He shouldn't have been able to tell her it wasn't…She loved him like no one else ever could, how could that not be different, wasn't that the right love?

And she cries.

She's not the girl in the movies. She doesn't take out a box of chocolate, or call girlfriends or watch romantic movies. She is not that girl with all those sorrows and all those comforts. She is nothing like that.

But she is human, and she has been hurt.

And for Akito, for God, that makes it even worse.

TTFN

Katia-chan


End file.
